Seriously Single - Part VI: The Crush

The great thing about the crush is that it recurrently happens with people we see on a regular basis. Like work. It can make you want to get up in the morning though for a while at least. It can make you think twice about what to wear to work, how to have your haircut and whether to wear the cheaper everyday ‘work’ perfume or the ‘going out to dinner want to impress and lure somebody’ perfume. There’s more smiling and show off type behaviour all trying to impress the crushee. The other good thing is that because it is just a crush and not the bona fide beginnings of anything really, you can treat them as friends and ask them to drinks and movies without there seeming to be anything other than innocent intent behind it. And then you can resume flirting. I think some crushes originate because we find out someone else has a crush on us. You look differently at that person then and wonder. It’s flattering and great for self-esteem but we have to be extremely mindful of the line we cross.

The bad thing about the crush (and I watched a friend go through this) is when you are already committed to somebody you love and then there it is out of the blue. Whoops crush. How did that happen? It’s not a bad thing if you keep it to yourself but there can be that point you reach where you have to choose. New crushes often seem alluring because the feelings come about that you had at the very early and exciting days with your current partner, whom you love. But at the end of the day, you know that the crush probably won’t last and the feelings are fleeting. Then you go home to your love grateful and happy that they are the one you want to be with for good.


Crushes can be harmful if you are in a relationship and your partner senses something amiss. Hurt feelings can have a huge impact on any relationship because there are issues of trust and insecurities about losing what you both have. But they can be and should be fairly harmless I think and often don’t last long. It can be fun and flirtatious and often when they pass you say to yourself,

“What the fuck was I on?”               

Crush Quotes